I get it. As writers, we want our work to resonate with people. We want them to read it and -- hopefully -- come back at some point in the future to read more of it. We agonize over how we can make that happen, meaning we try to figure out what people want, and that's fine. But if you're not also carving out a little piece of your heart and weaving it into what you're writing in one way or another, your writing will miss the mark. It will register as empty, dull, inane, and lackluster. No wants to read more of that. There's already way too much of it out there.
I'm lucky in that I fell head over heels in love with writing through personal journaling, so I've had a literal lifetime's worth of practice when it comes to making sure my writing is intimate enough. In fact, I'd almost argue that I've had the opposite problem most writers today have. If I'm not careful, I wind up injecting more of myself into my work than people even want to see. Whichever direction you're coming from, establishing and maintaining the right balance is the key to getting where you want to be with what you're doing.
Be Truly Genuine and Vulnerable
I read an article on authentic writing from a favorite writer on Medium recently that actually took me aback a little. He seemed to be arguing that no writer is ever truly genuine when they open up a vein for you and expose their more vulnerable side. He talked about how they're really only doing it because it gets them clicks, views, read, and comments.
Now, I won't argue that there are so-called confessional writers out there who are only looking to manipulate a reader into clicking that follow button or buying their next course. However, there are also many out there who are genuinely doing what they appear to be doing -- writing from the depths of their hearts because that's what the act of creation is about for them.
I can attest to that because I'm a writer like that. I will definitely admit to having ambitions for my writing. I like making money and having an audience. I'd love to take both my income and my reach as a writer much further in the years to come. However, I want to do that by expressing myself authentically or not at all. The writers I admire most have similar goals for their own work.
It helps that I know the pieces that have resonated with the highest number of readers didn't come to me when I was pushing myself to meet a goal or consciously trying to come up with something that would go viral. They happened on random Sundays when I sat down at my computer to write because my heart had something to say that day. That's not a coincidence.
Talk About Yourself as a Way to Teach Your Reader
We all know what it's like to have to listen to another person drone on and on about themselves. They're high as a kite on the sound of their own voice, repeatedly reliving cracker-dry personal stories that are of absolutely no interest to anyone but them. However, they don't notice this because they fail to really think of their listener. They're having a blast talking about themselves, so they simply assume the other person is equally enjoying the act of listening.
Writers can be this way, as well. Trust me, I get it. My first experience sharing any of my writing with an audience was on LiveJournal during the early 2000s, so I understand how cathartic the act of using writing to talk about yourself can be. It's not the early 2000s anymore, though. And unless you're one of the relics who can't let go of the nostalgia factor of the place, you're probably not using LiveJournal as your platform of choice, either.
You have three choices when it comes to how you can reach your reader. You can entertain them, you can inspire them, or you can teach them. If you're really lucky, you'll be able to do all three of those things at once. Backing up the meat of your writing with personal stories is one compelling way to personalize your writing, set it apart, and make it come alive for your readers. Tell them all about how you've scored your wins in life and overcome your fuck-ups. Help them learn from your experiences. It'll create a powerful experience for both of you.
Keep Realness Front and Center... Always
Anytime you're confronted with a choice between keeping it real and pulling a deep fake for the sake of raking in views or money, my advice is to keep it real. Other writers' mileage may vary, but cheap money grabs have never really worked out for me personally speaking. It's one reason why I've made a commitment to myself and the small audience I do have to always be as authentic as possible.
It's also why I don't use my personal brand to endorse other people's products. People have asked, especially regarding my Medium account, when one of my stories is doing better than average. I'm really not interested. Not only does Medium pay me well enough that I don't need to take anyone else's money in that particular context, but I'm a copywriter. Not only do I not mind using my writing skill to promote other people's products and businesses, but there's even a part of me that likes it.
I will always want anything attached to my real name to be 100 percent representative of the real me, though. Deep down, I will likely always be that innocent little tween who discovered she loved to write when she opened her first journal and wrote "Dear Diary" for the first time. I'll always most value vulnerable, authentic self-expression that helps me as much as it helps anyone who enjoys it. And I genuinely believe that's as it should be.
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