Here I Am, For Real

On selfies, tarot spreads, and showing more of the face behind the words

So, I’ve been thinking a lot about faces lately. Not just the ones we show to the world, but also the ones we hide, as well as the ones that slip out in quiet moments when we think no one’s really looking.

Yesterday was Seth's birthday, and we had a little Lord of the Rings fire pit party planned. I wanted to clean up a little bit out back, get things ready, and maybe cut some flowers for a table centerpiece before it got too late in the day. 

I also spontaneously decided it was a good opportunity to brush out my hair, put on some simple makeup, and maybe snap a quick selfie or two. (It had been a while.) 

So I did that and shared one of the selfies across my social media platforms, just for a little something different. Nothing super staged, just me as I was on a sunny Saturday afternoon, pro "pineapple on pizza" t-shirt, sigil rings, and all. People loved it, as it had been a while since I'd really shared anything raw, behind the scenes, or completely unfiltered.

That, combined with how far back a Facebook friend recently had to dig into my timeline to find real pictures of me, made me realize I need to share more of this. Not because mysticism, myth-making, art, and creativity somehow aren’t real (because they absolutely are), but because even the best creative content can start to feel disembodied if I never anchor them back to the ordinary human face that’s living them into existence.

So this is me floating some of the same energy into my long-form writing spaces, tea in hand, freckles and shadows intact.

Faces Matter

Something I've noticed over my many years as a ghostwriter, copywriter, and essay writer of all stripes (and have been reminded of). People don’t truly fall in love with content. They fall in love with the people and stories behind it.

The articles, the images, the mystical fragments — those things might absolutely draw someone in who's never been to your world before, but what keeps them watching is ultimately the human heartbeat underneath it all. When I share my writing or my artwork without ever showing the person creating it, I imagine it can start to feel like it came from nowhere, like my voice is floating at people from out of a void instead of from another human.

The truth is, most of us want to know who’s behind the words. We want to see the face that laughs at its own bad jokes, the hands that shuffle the cards, the eyes that have cried through the lessons someone is now writing about. That’s what makes it real and keeps it relatable.

So showing my own face here for the first time in a while, freckles and all, is my way of saying, "Yes, the things I write about are real, but so am I." I'll do my best to make it a regular thing moving forward.

Reading the Week Ahead

Speaking of everyday tidbits to share, this morning’s divination spread came like a whisper from Wonderland itself (via my Disney's Alice in Wonderland deck, of course):

• Nine of Teacups: Satisfaction, small joys, the wish card reminding me that there is sweetness even in the simplest cup.

• Page of Flowers (Wands): Curiosity sparking at the edges. Something new, something playful, even if it’s small.

• Four of Teacups: And yet… the mood of quiet restlessness, of not always feeling like lifting my head to notice the gift that’s being offered.

The witch rune that followed was the Moon — tides, cycles, mystery. And from the Mabon Oracle, Fire Cider: “Dwell in the medicine that exists to protect the spirit.”

Together, they read like this. Pleasure and protection are here for me, but I don’t have to force them. I can let myself drift a little, keep my spiritual immune system strong, and trust the tide. Like a lot of people, I'm sure, I need those simple reminders from time to time.

Where I Am Right Now

That feels like the right message for this week, especially with Mabon/the fall equinox coming up tomorrow. Some days I’ll be full of spark, while other days I’ll feel like simply staring into space and letting time flow at its own pace. Both are valid approaches to a day, and both are part of my odd personal internal rhythm.

My life right now is a strange balance of creative energy, spiritual curiosity, and everyday struggle. I’ve been working to keep my daily practices steady — tarot, runes, salt water, incense, small meditations, and morning walks. But I've also been working hard at keeping my clients well served, staying steady with my own writing efforts, and planning for whatever's next.

And I think that’s what the season to come may be asking of me. To show up for all of that as a whole person. Not just a channel for archetypes and angels, and not just an artist or writer, but as a human woman with a face, a body, and a whole, nuanced life that still needs tending.

So, here’s to the week ahead, I suppose. A likely mix of contentment and melancholy, curiosity and rest, like so many of my weeks. And here’s to keeping the fire cider spirit close, warming, protecting, reminding me that medicine can not only be simple but also often already at hand.

Here’s to showing up, too. Mythic, messy, and unapologetically real all at once.